stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
Perfect. And my grandma just called me and talked to me for eighteen minutes telling me that she was worried because of my Halloween costume that I'm not a Christian and that I'm not eating. Wtf.
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
Randomize
