Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
Theres a live mouse in the toilet. Goddamn you this is why I don't party here
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
Randomize
