LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
you're close to getting here right? Because if you're still not here and I have to get dressed to answer the door for the pizza guy, i'm tipping him $100 on your credit card to spite you
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
There's a difference tho. *I* drink at seven in the morning because I work graveyards. YOU drink at seven in the morning cause you're an alcoholic.
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