Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
and now that ive poetically compared your vagina to a nuclear missile, I hope youre prepared for this date.
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
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