i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
If you're going to drink sriracha straight from the bottle whilst crying, at least wear the giant sombrero for the enjoyment of your audience.
During sex his mom asks from the other side of the door, "Do you like avocados?" Who doesn't like avocados?
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
Some guy is in my phone as Pat McAwesome.
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
Randomize
