you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
It was my birthday today and i decided that i am not checking my notifications on facebook so ill feel popular
Wrong number and your a loser
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
I’m also apparently a very socialist drunk now
Instead of a horny one. All I want to fuck is capitalism these days.
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
Randomize
