that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
Dan marino should def buy this ambulance. But not this one. I'm gonna fuck this ambulance up
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
I masturbated to my balding thirty-something co-worker last night. I am a new level of lonely.
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
Some guy walking down the sidewalk just looked at me and said "hey it's the world champ". How drunk was I on Friday...?
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
Hey, um, after thinking about it, I decided I really don't want to use applying olive oil to your ass for your fissure as part of foreplay because... well... really? Just read that again.
Randomize
