Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
How do you leave a condom wrapper under my mom's pillow...
This may not be the best moment to laugh, but I am.
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
Randomize
