your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
Randomize
