so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
She went to the bathroom before i broke up with her so i changed all 2500 of her songs on her computer to "I'm a cheating whore"
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
She was giving me that "well this is awkward since you drunkedly tried to hook up with me" look.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
Whenever I'm hungover I try to stay in public as much as possible, hoping to be a cautionary tale to children. It's a public service, really.
And on the first day of my adult job, I matched with one of my co workers on tinder...
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
Randomize
