Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
I was actually kinda bummed my STD test came back negative.
That would have been proof he'd slept with the stripper. Lame.
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
I was wondering if I fell or perhaps got hit by a truck, then I remembered, it's cause I did a splits contest at the bar
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
Pretty sure I was rubbing Halloween candy all over my face and saying "these are my bitches."
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
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