So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
Karaoke machines out. We're taking turns farting into the microphone. Shits going south fast. Definitely be awake when you get home.
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
Randomize
