so the weed I found in my fridge is actually lettuce. tell jim I need that 5 bucks after all
Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
he texted me at 1 in the morning to ask if i wanted to come over and play in the snow with him
at least he gets points for a creative booty call
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
You can kiss the security deposit goodbye after you and your boyfriend did donuts on his moped in the middle of the apartment. It was impressive since you were both too drunk to walk.
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
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