How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone.
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
I could fuck to npr.
I just walked by a dude at the gym covering himself in olive oil.
Randomize
