i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
Okay. Did anyone see me spend $1600 at the strip club last night? Or is this someone else's receipt in my pocket?
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
There are parrots here and they're headbanging to the music. There's also a clown and a pit bull that can jump onto tables. Too high for this shit.
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
I just used a gift card from my in-laws to buy their daughter a vibrator. What even are morals?
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
Randomize
