Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
Dude you just tried to have a one night stand with my ex girlfriend while we were trying to put you to bed upstairs.
but that still doesn't explain how i woke up on the couch down stairs.
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
I just got a standing ovation when i made it to work on New Years Day. good thing?
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
Fuck Sunday funday. Fuck real pants. Fuck the sun. Fuck Jameson. Fuck my life. Yes, I am hungover as shit sitting in my office eating bacon.
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
I'm on the toilet with no toilet paper. When are you coming over? I'm contemplating on just staying here until you arrive.
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
Randomize
