if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
i just remebered what i did last night, i asked a homeless man on a bike "hey whatcha doin with that bike, wanna make 5 bucks?" he agreed and then rode me on his handle bars a block away to the next bar.
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
Somewhere in this world my second husband is in 9th grade.
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
You tried tipping the cashier at Cook Out by shoving a dollar bill down his shirt and yelling "Magic Mike"
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
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