Just got booed while taking a piss and asked if I 'call that a penis.' Get me the fuck out nf yankee stadium.
Actions speak louder than pants.
I'm currently witnessing my drunk neighbor attempting to fold laundry on his front lawn. I think he's trying to spell out HELP.
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
Hey will pizza rolls help if you accidentally get a diabetic chihuahua drunk?
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
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