can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
And then I cried about the Cubs for a half hour. If my dignity hadn't already been lost by that point in the night, it sure as hell was then.
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
Just get over here and light metaphorical fireworks in my literal vagina
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Randomize
