11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
There was a lot of him and a little penis
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
We woke up, fucked, and shared a piece of my sister's first communion cake for breakfast.
And you thought you were going to hell last weekend.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
I'm on a treadmill at the gym ordering pizza on my phone so it'll get to my house around the time I get home. I NEED HELP. Or I'm a genius. I haven't decided.
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
Randomize
