are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
Pretty sure a homeless guy just told me to 'lick his balls clean' because I looked at him.
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
Maybe tomorrow I'll be drunk again and can provide you with texts at a more reasonable hour. Here's hoping. GOodnight. Tebow loves you
It's a "nonproductive" (vocab word) cough. It's like a constant tickle in my throat, like there's a little elf with feathers for feet going Gangnam style on my "uvula" (vocab word).
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
He said my vagina smelled like pomegranates. Its like my vagina is the fountain of youth.
The ass gains better be worth it
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