She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
Threw up on the baby. National Tequila Day is the eve of National I'm A Horrible Nanny Day.
OPIZZABONMYDICK
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
Why the fuck am I at this dorm meeting? I don't pay $50,000 a year to stay sober.
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
Randomize
