I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
Randomize
