Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
my little sister told my dad she found willy wonka's golden ticket in the backseat of my car. now my dad knows my boyfriend uses magnums.
i just threw up in front of the washington monument. such a scenic puke.
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
Randomize
