Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
i fucking swear, saying shit like "i dont get jealous" is like personally inviting your slutty friend to fuck the guy you slept with like a month ago
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
How is it that I know 4 different bartenders who won't charge me for drinks, but I can't get laid?
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Randomize
