I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
He talked to you for like two seconds while you were shit faced doing Forest Gump impressions...how is that possible?
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
Mehhh. I just tried to type 'extremely', and it auto corrected to 'creek rot'. IT KNOWS WHAT I LOOK LIKE
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
Randomize
