Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
I woke on the floor next to a big TV. Apparently I traded my bed for a 52 inch samsung and a box of pop tarts.
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
There is a drunk marine passed out on my porch. Mandy wouldn't sleep with him, Can you please come remove him?
I hear fucking Christmas music. I'm going to find fucking Santa and tell him to suck a dick and shut up for the next month
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
Randomize
