OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
If you don't get head tonight I will castrate you
Seriously. Castrate.
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
Randomize
