What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
Sign #1 this conference will suck: Ice breaker question, how many proud virgins do we have in the room, overwhelming response. Looks like I'm not getting laid this weekend.
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
I'm bleeding and have questions
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
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