Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
and the oscar for 'most creative swearing' goes to you for 'jesus's bloody fucksticks'
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
So it's official the pockets of my work apron exist solely for the purpose of secretly flipping off asshole customers and not losing my job.
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
Randomize
