You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
i had the deer in headlights look when she walked in and i was digging in her hamper
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
Randomize
