i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
Parents weekend was a success.
Yeah, I guess so if you consider being arrested and having your parents bail you out a success...
Bail could have come out of your pocket so yes, I think we were financially responsible this weekend.
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
Her facebook status said "just got a sign from god". I texted her and apparently she found a slice of pizza in the shower.
You almost married that.
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
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