how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
Day 8 of being sober: Sniffed an empty beer bottle at a restaurent and almost licked it. This is not working
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
We are magical, pot smoking, smart as hell, single as fuck, woodland dolphins.
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
Randomize
