i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
I left a cheeto on everyone's car trailing to the house i'm at, hanzel and gretel style.
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
"I'm a professor to university students" I say as I realize I have a nipple piercing that I have no memory of getting
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
Is it ironic that our divorce court is a block from where we had our reception? Or is it just sad? Alanis has confused my understanding of irony.
As we were walking to her place she stole a pizza from the delivery guy's car and when we got home she grabbed a slice, two beers, removed her pants, and said "call of duty?" im going to marry her
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
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