tell your sister to shave her snatch
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
she peed on how many people?
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
He stopped me mid-blow job to say that his new year's resolution was to stop hooking up. MID FUCKING BLOW JOB.
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
When we got into his bed, his damn parrot started making sex noises in the other room
Randomize
