____ banged a stripper...well technically she's now a hooker...
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
Yeah man it sucked balls. People on the bus probably thought I was fucking crazy. I was fetal position, taking up two seats with no shame whilst simultaneously panting.
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
I love you man I just want to hold you and fuck you until you only know my name
I don't know who you are but HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY NUMBER
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