u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
as we were stuffing their 24 of beer into our bags you kept saying you wanted cheese strings. closest things we found were kraft singles. as the guys came up the stairs you kept screaming 'GET THE CHEESE! GET THE CHEESE!'
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
We left the knife in your bed.
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
BRIAN AND ANTHONY SPOON FED MY BROTHER MACARONI AND CHEESE WHILE HE WAS FUCKING ZARA. THEY WENT TO HIGHFIVE HIM AND ZARA WAS LIKE "WOO!" AND HIGHFIVED THEM FIRST
I got some blow and a hand job from one of the strippers. So I guess I'm getting over the divorce.
Randomize