ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
I want to jerk off but my dog won't leave me alone. It's the most depressing cock block ever.
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
I feel like a food baby is going to burst from my stomach and eat all the leftovers until another food baby rips out of its stomach. And so on. It's truly a merry Christmas.
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize
