people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
I never thought that I'd ever use the phrase "and the resulting ice cream explosion" seriously at work...
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
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