She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
