He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
What are these yellow papers in the kitchen?
These are the tickets we got last night.
Did i sign this one as Grizzly Bear?
Yes...yes you did.
So I thought I was slick leaving his room this morning all incognito. Little did I know I was wearing his football jersey with his name across the back... stilettos & my bra was left behind. never seeing that again
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
Now you have tequila AND fuzzy slippers. Fuck you. I want that to be MY night.
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
She said my new name was "ranch" because I "looked delicious"
Yea... The gym isn't gunna happen today... When I was drunk last night I tried to prove I could front flip off the wheel cover of a semi... I fucked up my shoulder pretty bad... It was more of a roll
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
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