i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
So here's a tip: don't give a blowjob the same morning you're going to the dentist. Cuz they will think you have "mouth trauma."
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
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