Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
Got robbed by an ATM. My weekend officially sucks.
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
Are you drunk? You left me a voicemail at 5:59 AM of you making dolphin sounds.
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
Randomize