that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
I think I swiped left on my soulmate
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
Randomize