You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
Next time I say "i forgot to eat dinner, oh well" before drinking STRAP ME TO A CHAIR AND FORCE FEED ME BEFORE ALLOWING ME TO CONSUME BOOZE
Randomize