careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
My life has hit rock bottom, I'm watching a movie on lifetime about retarded people falling in love. And I'm jealous of their relationship.
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
I took 20 bucks from you because when I woke up I saw more of you than I ever wanted to see bro.
Totally acceptable.
You missed me roundhouse kicking a lit glow stick out of a guy's mouth last night. You would have been proud.
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
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