What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
come over after work tomorrow, liz and i will make all of your wildest dreams come true. so long as your wildest dreams involve drinking champagne at my house with two girls who won't have sex with you.
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
Randomize