After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
I threw up on my way to work while listening to "the good times are killing me". this award goes to modest mouse for creating the most poetic puke ever
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
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