he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
Randomize
