he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
vagina is talking i cant
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
I am going to tweet NASA until they put me into space
Those rocketship riding assholes need the common man
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
He keeps bees of course he's weird
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
Randomize
