So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
Why are all the lights on in my house? Every single one. Someone should turn them off but I'm the only one here and I'm sure as hell not doin it.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
When you can pee with one hand accurately while texting, you drink too much.
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
I'm wearing jeans from 7th grade and drinking a fucking macchiato. This better be a good day.
Randomize
